Q. Is there anything real behind a love quiz?

A. Good question. The answer is "maybe, maybe not". You see, the value of a love quiz depends upon who designed it and what the purpose of the love quiz is. If it was written by a magazine writer, for entertainment purposes, then that's a good example of the "maybe not" category. However, if the love quiz was written by a professional who is trained in behavioral sciences, psychology, or relationship counseling, then you might be over into the "maybe so" side of the answer.

You see, a love quiz can be based upon real, substantive issues, questions that really matter and answers that provide insight, or they can be frivolous and designed to give a few yucks to a group of bored girls.

If your love quiz has questions such as: "How important to you is quality time apart in a relationship?", or "Could you forgive infidelity if you were partially to blame for the act being committed?", then the love quiz is attempting to identify core relationship issues that tell you something about yourself and/or your significant other.

If, on the other hand, the love quiz has questions like: "Could you date a guy who wore braces?", or "What would you do if your crush burped in front of you?", then you're probably reading a teen magazine love quiz that has no significant value.

Even a love quiz that is written with the best intentions can provide misleading results if taken in an uncontrolled environment where the quiz taker may not understand a particular question or where the possible answers are confusing or poorly worded. For the best results, a genuine love quiz should be administered by a professional and the answers analyzed afterwards. That way issues can be explored and answers clarified.

The true purpose behind a professionally designed love quiz, especially a love quiz that is taken by both people in the relationship, is to determine whether or not the relationship has a long-term chance of survival based upon quantifiable personality characteristics that have been determined to be important in committed relationships.

These characteristics include all of the traits that you might expect such as: honesty, integrity, understanding, forgiveness, drive, ambition, moral strength, religious views, political affiliations, money management skills, sense of humor, and the importance of physical attractiveness to the other person.

By taking a love quiz that explores these issues, and having the results mediated by a qualified professional, a couple has the opportunity to make decisions about the viability of a long term relationship based upon their view of what is important to each other. If a love quiz results in one partner having viewpoints that are too far apart form the other partner's, then a red flag should be raised.

An entertaining love quiz, on the other hand, is best reviewed by a bunch of friends chatting on AOL Instant Messenger or their cell phones.

Whether the love quiz is for real, or for enjoyment only, the quiz takers should be cautioned against putting too much value in the final results.

No one should make long term relationship decisions based upon someone else's standards. In the end it is the magic and chemistry between two people that provides the answers to the only love quiz that really matters!

Q. I took a friend quiz in a magazine and it says that I don't make a very good friend. Can that really be true?

A. First, let me say congratulations! If the quiz said that you don't make a very good friend then you must have answered the quiz honestly, at least from the friend quiz author's point of view.

Now let's delve into the content of the quiz. The bad thing about a friend quiz is that it is automatically biased by the author's opinion of what makes a good friend.

For example: There might be a question that asks:

Your friend wants you to cover for her by telling her mother that she is sleeping at your house when she is really going to an all night party with her boyfriend. Do you say:

A. "No problem." B. "I'll do it but I'd rather not." C. "No way, you're on your own girlfriend."

What's the right answer? Well, the morally right answer is obviously "C". Would that make you a better friend that either "A" or "B"? Yes, actually, it would. There is a very good chance that something bad is going to come out of the all night party. Your friend could get drunk and become a victim of date rape, get injured or killed in a car accident, or get arrested if the police raid the party. As a good friend, you should care more about your friend's safety and security than her having a good time doing something that she has to lie about.

However, if the friend quiz rates you a snitch because you answered "C", then, according to the author, you're not a good friend.

Look. You don't need a friend quiz to know if you're a good friend, or if someone else if a good friend to you. Take the quiz for the fun of it, but don't take it seriously. Your heart knows if you are a good friend and what it means to have a good friend. Trust your instincts and not some stranger's value system. A person's friendship is far to valuable a gift to trust the results to a friend quiz.